Tuesday, August 18, 2009

The world is so much bigger than me.

Confession time: there are times in my life that I take pity on myself. Far too much pity than what I remotely deserve. I realize often that I get caught up in that pity and don't pay attention to the outer world as much as I should. However, because I realize this, I am extremely vigilant of these self-righteous feelings of obnoxiously-uncalled-for self pity that I get and do my best to reach outside of my own little world to attain a better sense of perspective, gratitude, and respect for the life that I have been given and for the choices that I have made.

Let's face it - we all have crappy things that happen to us. Everyday. Some of us have REALLY crappy things that happen. And some of those people with the really crappy shit are the most inspiring, beautiful, wise, and generous people that I have ever known. I am astounded at their strength, fortitude, wisdom, love, romance, and life that these people breathe into their daily "crap." And I humbly accept the fact that I will never be so beautiful, inspiring, or wise as these people. But that doesn't stop me from reading about them.

A little back story: I read blogs. No, wait, I LOVE to read blogs. I love to read blogs written by people who are PRESENT and caring and thoughtful about and within their lives. They are real, they are forgiving, yet honest about their own weaknesses, and they make me want to be a better person. The blogs that I read are like the little Reader's Digests of my days. (Reader's Digest (whom just declared bankruptcy) is my favorite magazine, by the way.)

So now that you know that I read blogs, and you know that I sometimes feel a little too much self pity for my own good I am going to share a couple of the blogs that I read and that I totally love. Each one of these blogs is written by a different writer. Each is about a different subject for the most part. But each affect me in a profound and yet, despite their differences, very similar way. The best part of every one of these blogs is the presence of the writer. The simple observations they make of their lives. The way they think and process and honor their feelings in words. In every blog I love to read, I am most struck by the way the writer is so present in their life. Even when they have to wade through the "crap."

Here is a small portion of the blogs I love to read, in no particular order:

The Fat Cyclist

NieNie Dialogues

Flotsam Blog

Pacing the Panic Room

Maggie Doyne's Blog

So here's my point: when you feel like your own little world is too much, reach out. The world is so much bigger than you. And me.

In closing, I must say one thing. I am extremely thankful to the powers that be that my dad is finally off of his feeding tube. I know it was painful (mentally and physically) for him to be on it. And despite the multiple challenges that he has faced this year, I am incredibly proud of him for enduring them, every day. Challenges are just that, no fun and just plain difficult. Good job dad! I have been rooting for you! We all have!

Here's a tiny taste of what's coming up next:



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